Principle behind this step is - Love
"Now we need more action, without which we find that 'Faith without works is dead'", Big Book, pg. 76, 3rd paragraph.
Well fellow travelers, we are on Step 9. I remember when I got to this point, I was scared, feeling reluctant and really needed to pray and remind myself that I had decided I would "go to any length" to find a spiritual experience which would be the solution to my compulsive overeating. With the help and support of a sponsor, we looked at my list, and decided how I could best make the amends I needed to make.
So, now we are going to continue following the directions in the Big Book and make direct amends to those people we have harmed. The Big Book - through examples lists three kinds of direct amends
1. Eyeball to eyeball - "I am sorry for what I have done".
2. Restitution - "I will make up for what I have done"
3. Taking the public consequences - "I will make known to other people what I have done."
Living amends is also discussed in the Big Book on page 82 and 83. Here the concept is that direct amends are not enough, what is needed here is a whole different way of being. Our living amends is one in which we change our behavior.
Finally on pg. 83, the Big Book discusses those amends, which we cannot make. Here the Big Book tells us if we are truly can not make these amends, but we are willing to make them if and when we could, that is enough.
Now here is the payoff. On pg. 83 of the Big Book, we are promised, "If we are painstaking about this phase of our development we will be amazed before we are halfway through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone we will see how our experience can benefit others. The feeling of uselessness and self-pit will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which use to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves."
Yes, these things are promised to us before we are half-way through! So do we need any more reason to continue? Go out, make your amends and feel the freedom. You deserve it. :)
1. Re-read: Pg. 76 "Now we need more action... to pg. 84 2nd paragraph.
2. Go over your amends list with your sponsor.
3. Make your amends
4. Write and share with the loop how one of your amends went.
5. Write and share on one of the promises. It could be one that has already come true or one that you are really look forward to coming true.
My prayers are with you.
The Twelve Steps
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