Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
The principle behind this step is FAITH.
LEADER'S SHARE AND STEP QUESTIONS
Hi again friends on this journey with me. It's always an honour to give service in this way, and it helps remind me where I've come from and where I never want to go back to. I've been in this program a really long time and yet I know that I'm still a compulsive overeater and always will be. But at least today unlike in the past I do have faith that God or the Higher Power of my choosing can restore me to sanity if I ask. For years I'd lived my life in self will so it was really hard for me to surrender my will and my life to a Higher Power at first, but I knew deep down that where perhaps I had managed some areas of my life on self will, where food was concerned I just couldn't anymore. I'd been on diets and belonged to diet clubs in the past where I could use self will and willpower, but it never helped long term. I could always stop eating compulsively while I was on diet but I could never stay stopped, and the weight always found its way back and sometimes even more. So I became willing to entertain the possibility that maybe this might work because nothing else in the past had ever worked long term. But it was real scary at first and to tell the truth I think my first months in OA when I was trying to lose weight, I probably still did do a fair amount on self will even whilst working the steps.
The turning point for me was when I kept slipping on my worst trigger food, and one day I woke up and literally begged my Higher Power to help me just for that day not to eat it. It was really hard in the beginning especially when my kids would get in the car and they'd be eating it and the smell would drive me crazy. But each day I asked my Higher Power for help to not eat it and many one days at a time I still don't. And for me that was the hugest miracle because firstly because I never believed that I could ever give it up and secondly that I could do it with my Higher Power's help.
The other miracle has been the fact that I can now listen to my intuition which as it says in the literature is God's direct line into our minds and hearts. Being a very rational logical person, in the past I'd always have an if-then hypothesis which I'd use when deciding whether or not to do something, so my head rather than my heart governed all my actions. When I was finally able to listen to my intuition the first time even though my intellectual mind said it was crazy, it turned out to be exactly the right decision, and that made it easier for me to listen to that still small voice in future. In fact listening to it even helped me finally to forgive and make peace with my ex husband, something I thought I'd never I'd be able to do in a million years.
Today I've given up trying to reason in my head how and why it works. All I know is that when I do the footwork and I turn my will and life over to my Higher Power, things work out and I'm able to stay out of the food one day at a time, something I never thought possible in the past. As it says in the OA 12 &12 "I can't; God can; I think I'll let God!" p.19.
And in The Big Book "on page 58 it says "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are those who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves."
The founder of OA, Rozanne S, who sadly passed away last week has this wonderful prayer which sums up how important it is for us to not have to do this program on our own and on self will and here it is.
"I put my hand in yours and together we can do what we could never do alone.
No longer is there a sense of hopelessness; no longer must we each depend on our own unsteady willpower. We are all together now, reaching out our hands for power and strength greater than ours, and as we join hands, we find love and understanding beyond our wildest dreams."
I know today it's getting easier to turn my will and my life over to my Higher Power and trust that I will be taken care of, and as a result my life works so much better. Thankfully I have also been willing to be honest with myself and do the footwork, and I'm so grateful that I have and that I'm on this recovery journey one day at a time.
ASSIGNMENT AND QUESTIONS ON STEP THREE
First read step three in the OA 12 & 12 and "How it works" in the AA BB pages 58-63 if you have them. Now answer the following questions honestly.
1. In what ways have you tried to run your life on willpower?
2. Are you convinced after working steps one and two that you really are powerless and need some help with your compulsive overeating (COE)?
3. What do you fear most about taking this step and turning your will and life over to your Higher Power, in other words how does the idea of "letting go absolutely" make you feel?
4. In what area/s of your life do you experience the greatest struggle to let go and turn things over?
5. What are some of the old ideas you are still holding on to?
6. As it says in the Big Book do you still feel you could find an easier softer way?
7. If you cannot make the decision today, can you "act as if" you did? Explain.
8. What would you like your HP to do in your life?
9. How will you know you're getting guidance from your HP?
And here is the wonderful third step prayer from the Big Book that I try and remember to say every morning so that I remember to turn my will and life over to my Higher Power.
THIRD STEP PRAYER: God, I offer myself to Thee. To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties. That victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love and Thy Way of Life. May I do Thy will always. - Page 63, Big Book
The Twelve Steps