A client shared their appreciation to me last week and I immediately thanked them for it.
This was a hard one for me. But when I started praying for those I do not like, this because very easy for me. This makes it easier for me when they are around and they no longer stir up feelings inside of me.
Whenever I am disturbed, there is usually a resentment or anger going on inside of me and it is my problem to deal with. The cause of the resentment or anger is usually long gone and the internal issues are all mine to deal with. I do not handle holding onto anger well because the feelings make me want to eat.
The two things I must guard against are resentments and anger. Also, I must guard against those situations where I need to express anger to somebody rather than let the person walk all over me. This is also how I maintain my emotional balance.
Emotional hangovers (or head trips) are very dangerous for me because they stir feelings of anger and resentments without actual events taking place. I used to do this for situations at work and my head would go places where things would never happen and I would feel so crappy for no reason at all.
I must always remain honest with myself no matter what and keep out of denial in all areas of my life. I call upon the Lord to help me in this on a daily basis.
Love In Recovery,
The Twelve Steps