Week 5 - Step 9
Sorry this is so late in the day. I had it ready but forgot to email it. Thank you to the angel who sent a friendly reminder!
How did you do with your list of amends? Last week, we talked about going over your list of amends with your sponsor or spiritual advisor, to make sure that none of the intended amends might cause harm to another. Did you prioritize the list, by the easiest to make, ones that will be hard, and then the "no way Jose" group?
Step nine may take you more than a week to do. But we'll get started this week and then commence with your tenth step next week. The amends will be ongoing until you've completed them. We'll worry about step ten next week, so let's look at how to go about making the amends.
Start your reading on the bottom of page 76, a little repeat of last week but it will help you to get ready to take step 9. On page 77, it tells us why we are doing this - to put or lives in order, and to fit ourselves to be of maximmum service to God and the people about us.
We setting right wrongs we have done to others. The hardest thing for me was no expectations. And it is hard to approach people who have done us more harm than we did them. But we're talking here about a step that will insure our continued abstinence. Reading the bottom of page 77, we see that this is about cleaning up our side of the street only.
In the middle of page 78, we read about the financial amends - the people we owe money. I owed some people money - a previous employer, from when I was padding my expense account to get more food. I was worried about the future reference when they learned I was stealing from them. But I sent them what I thought I owed. They cashed the check!
Many of my amends were letters that I wrote to people who were not in this area. I went over each amends with my sponsor to see if my amends was appropriate. There is a part on this step that we must honor, "except when to do so would injure them or others".
I had an affair with a married man. Bringing this up to his wife could hurt her. My sponsor suggested that I not contact her. I wrote a letter to say how sorry I was but it was not to be mailed.
Read on through page 79 - it reminds us thaat the purpose of these amends is finding a spiritual experience. Pray for strength and direction to do the right thing, no matter the possible consequences to us. Keep reading through page 83 for more insights on the amends process.
Finally, read the bottom of page 83 and the top of 84. Wow, look at the promises. You are entitled to them!
Once again, review each intended amends with your sponsor to insure that no one will be hurt by it.
You can journal about this step if you would like some clarity. But this step is an action step. Go for it!
Next week, we really start living our recovery as we learn about the tenth step. Keep that abstinence first, absoulutely.
The Twelve Steps
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