My name is Shlomo.
I am a food addict and compulsive overeater.
We will continue dealing with the fear inventory.
1. Read pages 67-68 in the Big Book:
"Notice the word 'fear'...It seems to cause more trouble."
Mark the sentences that resonate with you and those that describe you.
Also go over the fears you wrote in the third column of the resentment table and the fears you wrote in answer to the question 'Where had we been frightened."
Reflect and share with us.
2. Read page 68 "We reviewed our fears...it was worse."
We will use our notebook again and make a three column fear table on one side of the page.
A) First we fill the first column . The heading of this column will be "What/who am I afraid of?"
You can use the following support file to help you fill that column.
B) After we finish filling the first column (It may take several pages), we begin with the second column "Why do I have those fears".
When you write why you have a certain fear you may find out that you write additional fears. Add them to your first column if they are not already there.
C) After filling the second column entirely we begin with the third column. "Where did self reliance fail us?" Look again at the support file "seven parts of self."
Write down where relying on one or several of the seven parts of self failed us and we became afraid.
3. Read page 68 "Perhaps there is a better way... We commence to outgrow fear."
Mark the sentences that resonate with you.
Pay special attention to the following: The turnaround from self reliance to God reliance, courage means faith, the special prayer.
Pay special attention to the part of the prayer that says 'what he would have us be (not do).
Also the release from fear is a process not an event.
Reflect and share with us.
I suggest you say the prayer on a daily basis.
You are invited to ask questions.
QUESTIONS TO THE LEADER
I am not sure about my answers to the second column of the fear inventory. Here is an example. Could you tell me if I am on track? Here is the fear: Being Less than, not good enough. Why I have it: People won't like me, they'll talk down to me, I won't have any friends, I'll be alone, I'll dislike myself even more, I'll become even more depressed.
Your answers to the question in the second column are fine and right on track. Next you have to answer the questions in the third column. "Where did self reliance fail us?" You look at the seven parts of self:
- Self Esteem - How I think of myself
- Pride - How I think others view me
- Pocketbook - Basic desire for money, property, possessions, etc.
- Personal Relations - Our relations with other people
- Ambition - Our goals, plans and designs for the future
- Emotional Security - General sense of personal well being
- Sex Relations - Basic drive for sexual intimacy
And ask yourself which of those parts of self were not up to the task (were weak), And thus were at the root of what you wrote in the second column. In the case of the example here, it is your self esteem, your pride, your personal relations and your emotional security that are low and are at the root of your fear.
After that you say the prayer asking God what He would have you be. Then write on the blank side of the page what you think God would have you be. Eventually you will begin to outgrow that fear. Outgrowing a fear means that you do what you should do even when you are afraid. Courage is not the absence of fear. It is doing what should be done in spite of the fear.
The Twelve Steps
© Copyright 1995 ~ 2008 THE RECOVERY GROUP All rights reserved