WTS ~ WORKING THE STEPS

2008

Step One
We admitted we were powerless over food
that our lives had become unmanageable.



STEP ONE, PART FOUR

Hi everyone,
My name is Shlomo and I am a food addict and compulsive overeater.

Let us continue.

As we can see from what we have studied so far, our main problem is in our mind, the mental aspect of our disease. A person who has only the physical aspect can decide not to touch his triggers and carry out his decision all his life. A food addict can't because his obsessive thoughts will override his decision and convince him to eat his triggers.

The longest trip we will take in this workshop is the trip from our heads to our heart Such a trip is the digesting all the given information about our disease and the internalizing of it. Therefore the Big Book says "We learned that we had to fully concede to to our innermost selves that we were food addicts. This is the first step in recovery . The delusion that we are like other people or presently may be, has to be smashed" page 30.

Internalizing my problem is the first initial step I have to take before taking the 12 steps. As long as I am driven by my obsession not to see the truth about me, and to believe a lie that I can now or in the future eat like normal people , I will remain actively in my disease. Believing a lie and being blind to reality is a kind of insanity. Taking the first bite repeatedly and expecting to handle my food, is for me an insane act and thought. Even more insane is planning and executing a binge when knowing that it will be a binge and not just a bite.

Some insanities may be dealt with by professional help. Mine can not. I tried. I even tried hypnotic treatment. Nothing helped. I couldn't get rid of my obsession by dealing with the obsession.

The reason for that is the third aspect of my disease-the spiritual aspect. Living my life as a food addict made me react abnormally not only to food but to life itself. I became controlled by negative feelings, by negative attitudes, and negative actions, towards myself and others. The Big Book calls it a "spiritual malady" and this is the third aspect of my disease. This spiritual malady feeds my obsession and is fed by it . And doesn't let me to deal with my obsession.

ASSIGNMENTS

Read and mark the following paragraphs and sentences in the Big Book that describe the spiritual aspect of our disease.
Reflect on the manifestation of this aspect in your life and share with us.

1. The bedevilments, page 52: "We had to ask ourselves...."

2. Pages 60-62: "The first requirement.....We had to have God's help"

3. Page 64: "Resentment is....mentally and physically" ... Page 66: "It is plain...to drink (eat triggers) is to die"

4. Page 67: Fear "This short word.....set the ball rolling"

Share on how each of the four spiritual malady assignments describe you personally to some degree.

Shlomo





 
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