When completing my inventory in Step 4, I held on to the list I'd made--keeping it in a safe and secure place so that I could have it handy to continue on as a reference for working my Step 10.
I had forgotten a few items which should have made it into my first inventory list, so I remembered to add them in Step 10. If I was at work or driving to and from, I kept a tiny spiral book in my purse so that I could keep adding things in a spontaneous manner before I forget them.
The amazing thing was that as I got the hang of keeping my inventory, it made me more conscious of the feelings of others so that I could begin to make nearly immediate amends and reparations. II no longer had to carry these things upon my conscience (my former trendy pieces of matching luggage) not to mention that I significantly less sheep to count in trying to get to sleep each night.
I became more comfortable with making an immediate amends. Did my "pride muscle" get a workout? Oh yes! "I'm sorry, I was wrong," has never been an easy thing for me to say. Although I am very glad I became willing so that my inventory lists no longer resemble essays, and my spirit has become lighter and more free.
Step 10 is just as important as Step 4. I want my recovery to lean greatly towards the plus side of the infinite line of serenity. How about you?
1) Do you find that you are catching your mistakes and apologizing more?
2) Is your inventory list getting shorter?
3) Are you still struggling with forgiveness before you can truly make your amends?
4) Is there anything else you would like to share about your personal process in taking Step 10?
If you have had uncomfortable feelings at any time within this study and with the questions, I hope that you are willing to seek the help that you need in order to express these feelings and to continue your growth and healing. Nothing can take the place of having a sponsor to help guide you through your recovery areas.
My thoughts, prayers, and high hopes are with you as you do this challenging, introspective work.
SUGGESTED READING: CHAPTER 6, "INTO ACTION" (towards the last 2 or 3 pages of that chapter -- the 2 paragraph reading starts . . . "It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. . . .")
A WTS Member has requested more Big Book thoughts on "conscious contact with God." Check out the last 3 paragraphs of the Big Book chapter entitled, "A Vision For You."
Knowledge without action is the greatest self-con of all.
DYNAMIC BIG BOOK THOUGHT : "Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking [overeating] as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. . . ." AA Big Book, 3rd Ed., Chapt. 7, 1st paragraph.
---Sharon W. Cruse
If we don't let go, we can't move forward.