Step Six

Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.



STEP SIX



STEP SIX

Step 6: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

SIXTH STEP PRAYER

Dear God,
I am ready for Your help in removing
from me the defects of character
which I now realize are an obstacle to
my recovery. Help me to continue
being honest with myself and
guide me toward spiritual and
mental health.

I think I had known that I had certain defects of character for sometime. I knew I could go on a rage binge, and afterward fell really bad for having done it. I know it was not good, but I did not seem to know how to deal with it. I knew that I was repeating mistakes in my life that seemed to be holding me back, professionally and economically. And so on. But I had no way to deal with these situations. I simply did not know how, could not have done it, before I cam into these rooms. I had tried many things, many times, but nothing had worked for me. I continued in the same old same old, and my addiction, being progressive, only got worse.

What I can to realize was that I was asking for magic, and refusing a miracle. I wanted God to wave a wand and make everything well, everything all right. But I didn't want it to have to involve anything on my part. What I began to learn in these rooms was that a miracle was available, if only I were willing to turn my life over to the care of a loving God as I understood God. Whenever I was willing to make myself available for it, my Higher Power would relieve me of these defects. There was no magic in it. I was learning that miracle is the true natural order of things. But I could not see it for a long, long time.

Nor did all of this require in spiritual surgery. I raged because I did not know what to do with the anger I felt at people who violated my boundaries, and at the seeming raw deal I was getting in life. I was. Of course, in no way responsible for these maladies, and if God was worth anything, why wasn't my prayer for magic being answered?

But as time in recovery passed, I came to realize that rage was like dropping a match into a can of gasoline. On the other hand, the can of gasoline could be used to fuel an engine. When I became angry, I could use that anger to fuel my recovery and to learn where my boundaries were, and how to stop people from violating mine, and me from violating theirs. Rage stopped happening, and the miracle had occurred. But it was not by never being angry. It was because I came to see that anger was a natural reaction to certain things, and that I could use it for good ends. I did not discover this alone. I had to be ready to hear the truth. I had to get ready, before the truth could come to me. And then the miracle would happen.

The same was true in my life choices. I was making bad choices because I was being so completely rational that I would not listen to my intuition, which is where I could go to ask my Higher Power what was going on in and around me. I discovered what is, in fact, a scientific truth: No decision made by reason alone will prove sound. The emotional affect has to accompany anything that was going to work. Not by switching back and forth from one to another, as being sweet one day and raging the next, but by connecting the two in a new and healthy way. I had to become willing for this to happen. I had to let go and let God.

Then I began to see that this was only the beginning of miracles.

Love in recovery,
John


Step 6 Questions

1. You have already made a list of your defects, and broken out of isolation by sharing this list with God, ourselves, and another human being. That was not easy for many of us, especially the first time or two around. But harder still it is to accept that there is nothing that we can do, in reality, to change our situation – except to let go and let God. And we have to make ourselves ready to stand in that space.

A. How do you see yourself moving into this space of recovery?

B. How do you think it would be to live without your defects? Can you be sure that you are entirely willing to let go of them?

2. Take a look at your defects.

A. Can you see how they might be changed into something that would make your life, and the lives of those around you better?

B. What do you think this change would look like to you. Imagine it.

3. A. Can you see the difference between magic and miracle? (This distinction, by the way, dates back to classical antiquity. It is not something I made up.)*

B. How do you see yourself in the past having sought magic?

* Just for edification, magic runs contrary to nature. It attempts to contradict nature with acts that cannot be supported in nature. Miracle uses the energies of nature to change things that need to be changed. We are directed to these energies when we turn over to HP, and ask God to show us where the strengths lie. After all, God put them there.

Can you see how you yourself are a miracle?

Love,
John



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