Step Eight


"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."


Step Eight Contents:

Introduction
Part 1 and Questions for journaling
Part 2 and Questions for journaling
Part 3 and Questions for journaling
Part 4 and Questions for journaling

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Step Nine


Step Eight ~ Introduction

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."




In Step Seven, we have asked our Higher Power to remove our shortcomings that we discovered in our prior Step work. We are now ready to take action with Step Eight which asks us to:

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed and become willing to make amends to them all."

Notice that this step doesn't tell us to actually make these amends ~ that comes in Step Nine. We are to make our list and pray for the willingness. Once that is done we can move on.

Audrey is our Step Leader for Step Eight. Welcome to WTS ~ Working the Steps, Audrey. We look forward to this month under your guidance.




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Step Eight ~ Part 1

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."




Hello, my name is Audrey and I will be your leader for Step Eight this month of August. Thanks for all the ones that have gone on before me in leading the steps.

I can remember the days of out-of-control eating, I was more obessed with food than developing relationship with other people. I really didn't realize how much I had isolated myself. I, as many had thought that once the food problem was solved, everything would be grand. What happen with me was the defective ways of dealing with others was a real source of pain for me. Many times I thought to myself it would be easier to just eat again rather than face dealing with others.

If I was to remain abstient and find the serenity I needed, there had to be a better way dealing with others. Something that would bring me joy instead of pain. Step Eight is here to help us with this. We will be looking for patterens which have done us harm and to others. We will meet an old friend, Guilt, and get rid of it. Then we will meet someone else, Forgiveness, as we learn how to forgive ourselves and others. Then we become willing to make amends, to change in the way we deal with the people who share our lives.

My schoolmate visited me, and I fully acquainted him with my problems and deficiencies. We made a list of people I had hurt or toward whom I felt resentment. I expressed my entire willingness to approach these individuals, admitting my wrong. Never was I to be critical of them. I was to right all such matters to the utmost of my ability. Big Book page 13

Step 8 Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.





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Step Eight ~ Part 1: Questions

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."






1. Explain what is harm?

2. Think about some of the ways you have been harmed, can you look back over your life and see where you did the same thing to other people?

3. Where will you draw from to get a list of names of people you have harmed? Can you name anyone that will be on that list? Not necessary just up to you.





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Step Eight ~ Part 2

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."




Hello, my name is Audrey and I am a recovering COE. And your leader for this month of August on Step 8, this the second week of questions. It never ceases to amaze me how each year answering these questions over and over, we reveal something new about ourselves just shows you how powerful the 12 Steps are.

Big Book page 76 Now we need more action, without which we find that "Faith without works is dead." Let's look at Steps Eight and Nine. We have a list of all persons we have harmed and to whom we are willing to make amends. We made it when we took inventory. We subjected ourselves to a drastic self appraisal. Now we go out to our fellows and repair the damage done in the past. We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves. If we haven't the will to do this, we ask until it comes. Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol.

Last week with the questions you realized you had already made a list of all persons you had harmed. To a degree, we have already done this when taking moral inventory. But we are down to business now. we are to redouble our efforts, to see how many people we had hurt and in what ways.






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Step Eight ~ Part 2: Questions

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."



1. This reopening of emotional wounds some old, dome forgotten and some still painful. Will this look like a purposeless and painless piece of surgery to you? Explain your answer.

2. Have we not the moment we realize a twisted or broken relationship with another person, put our emotions on the defense? How did this make you feel?

3. After we have given ourselves an excuse for minimizing our own wrongs, what should we do next?

4. Did we not aggravate the defects of others with our sick emotions? Explain

5. Did we not repeatedly strained the patience of our family and friends to a snapping point? Explain

6. Since we are about to ask forgiveness for ourselves, why shouldn't we start out by forgiving others one and all? Explain.





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Step Eight ~ Part 3

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."





Dear Loopies ~

Hello, my name is Audrey and I am a recovering COE. And your leader for this month of August on Step 8, this is the third week of questions. It never ceases to amaze me how each year answering these questions over and over, we reveal something new about ourselves just shows you how powerful the 12 Steps are.

Big Book page 80 in 12 & 12 of AA Calm, thoughtful reflections upon personal relations can deepen our insight. We can go far beyond those things which were superficially wrong with us, to see those flaws which were basis, flaws which sometimes were responsible for the whole pattern of our lives. Thoroughness, we have found, will pay -- and pay handsomely.

First week with the questions you realized what harm meant. The next week we looked at where we had this list of people we had harmed. But we got down to business last week, we redouble our efforts, to see how many people we had hurt and in what ways. Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol (food).

This week we are looking at how we are feeling doing this Eighth Step. The Emonations that we were going through working step eight. This is tough, realizing we were going to make face to face admission of our conduct to those we had hurt.






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Step Eight ~ Part 3: Questions

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."




1. Wasn't it enough we had to admit to ourselves, another human being and to God? Explain

2. Did we cry shouldn't bygones be bygones? Explain

3. This is some of the ways fear conspired with pride to hinder our making a list of all the people we had harmed. We even asked ourselves, "why do we have to think of these people at all?" explain

4. What real, I mean real harm had we done to families and where we worked? Just because we were compulsive overeaters, what real hard had we done?

5. Sometimes we will see the harm we have done others very clearly, how it affected them. I think at these times we may actually have given our emotions a violent twist which discolored out personalities and altered our lives for the worse. But what about the emotional harm we had done to ourselves?





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Step Eight ~ Part 4

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."





Dear Loopies ~

Hello, my name is Audrey and I am a recovering COE. And your leader for this month of August on Step 8, this is the fourth week of questions. It never ceases to amaze me how each year answering these questions over and over, we reveal something new about ourselves just shows you how powerful the 12 Steps are. This is the last week for step eight. Thank you for letting me be your leader this month. I can't close this step out without saying this from page 164 Big Book.

"Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Disunity. May God bless you and keep you -- Until then.

Page 156 Big Book One morning he took the bull by the horns and set out to tell those he feared what his trouble had been. He found himself surprisingly well received, and learned that many knew of his drinking. Stepping into his car, he made the rounds of people he had hurt. He trembled as he went about, for this might mean ruin, particularly to a person in his line of business.

At midnight he came home exhausted, but very happy. He has not had a drink since. As we shall see, he now means a great deal to his community, and the major liabilities of thirty years of hard drinking have been repaired in four.

Step 8 Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.






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Step Eight ~ Part 4: Questions

"Make a list of all persons we had harmed
and become willing to make amends to them all."




1. We have defined the word harm. To define the word "harm" in a practical way, we might call it the result of instincts in collision, which cause physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual damage to people. Can you explain how you might have caused physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual damage to people?

2. Now let us think of some of the subtler ways we have caused damage, that can be as damaging as the ones in question one. Were we cold, irritable, humorless?

3. So, we have surveyed the whole area of human relations, we know exactly what personality traits in us injured others. Now what do you do next?





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