Hi guys ... Auds here, sober and abstinent one day at a time by the grace of God, this fellowship, and my own effort.
I remember once years ago when I called a friend in the program, I shared exuberance. I don't remember why I was exuberant but I do recall my first sponsor saying this too shall pass.
How dare he why did he say that. I asked him in a how dare you tone of voice and he laughed. Now that was the last straw.
Remember, he said how good you feel now, remember when the tough times come how good abstinence and sobriety feel. hmmmm! got it.
Another friend told me that the reason we are so frightened by a bad day is because, when we were using each day was a bad day and we are afraid that all those bad days are returning. hmmmmm. got it
Soooo. when we have a good day we need to remember why that day was so good. When my addictions are not catered to, when my spiritual health is good, when just for today I do self estimable acts, and when I go to enough meetings to hear the things I need to hear, my road of happy destiny is just that, happy.
This past week I have been traveling to several different states and had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with my darling sponsor.
She was supposed to go with me to Martha's Vineyard but was unable to go due to a pulled hamstring. Oh sadness, yes ... but my trip was shorter, which was good for my health. I am not able to drive long distances without damage to my circulation. So here is what I believe. I don't always know what makes me happy, faith comes with mileage. When I let go and let God, good surprises always happen.
I went to four meetings with my sponsor in three days and guess what? I heard lots of things I needed to hear. One gentleman, shared that he had a serious medical problem and he went to a specialist. On the wall behind the nurses station was a sign which said:
"Yesterday is History.
Tomorrow is a mystery.
Today is a gift.
That's why they call it the present!
Next spoke a man who is so grounded in the program that every time he speaks he makes me grateful that I was privileged to hear him. He shared that he had little time left on this earth. He shared that the love he had for his wife and the blessings of their marriage, made him treasure each moment. He was grateful each day for the little things that make all of us happy. He smiled and the smile came from his center. He told us not to feel sorry for him, he was very happy at this moment. He told us not to call him and commiserate or he would ask us to hang up and try again. Here is the program at work. He is not afraid of the future, he said that he has turned his will and his life over to the care of God and since then his higher power has done a great job. We laughed about old memories and planned future ones. If I had been going to Martha's Vineyard I might have missed that meeting. This gentle man will pass (so will we all) but I told him and I believe that while he is remembered and quoted his contribution to this program and our love for him will continue to grow. Wow! What a thought! I went to an Eleventh Step meeting and boy was there a lot of sharing about the spiritual condition which keeps me centered. I am so grateful to have grateful people in my life. I am still learning, I don't want to graduate again. I guess my higher power is tuned in to what I need. and again I say I am grateful.
As always ... take what you need and leave the rest.
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