FOUNDER'S CORNER
Sharing

Dear Friends on the Journey ~

"I love sharing my story. It's endlessly healing."
     . . . Ben Vereen

We are so blessed to have OA face-to-face and online meetings and support groups. The word, "share" is such a good one to describe what we do at these meetings and in our support groups. It's a much better word than "discussion."

When we discuss, we take a topic and thrash it about and each person contributes their ideas and suggestions and then another person does the same thing and at the end of the discussion many times we collectively find closure, solutions, answers and resolutions.

In OA we SHARE rather than discuss. We have to own something to share it. It has to be our feelings, our hopes, our dreams, our disappointments, our shame, our frustrations, our happiness, our sadness. It is in the sharing that we reap the dividends and not the responses ... not the advice. And it is in the listening to others share their own experiences, their strength and their hope that we find the bits and pieces that relate to our lives.

In the Recovery Group loops and meetings, we have beautiful and healing shares. Part of the reason for this is that most of us who have been in OA or other 12 Step Groups for a long time have learned to share in a way that will do us and others the most good. We share alone ... it is not a discussion. We first tell our friends in the fellowship "how it was." It could be yesterday, in childhood or when we were at the bottom of our illness. We then share "what happened" when we applied program. Finally, we share "how it is now." While we may have begun with a negative, we end with a positive.

How it was ...
What happened ...
How it is now.

And these three things equal hope. And that hope is "endlessly healing" and spreads to everyone listening ... because it is shared.

@-}-}-}------
Love in recovery,
Mari

(... a Zen Aphorism)

I have often heard this quote in the past, and didn't really know what it meant. It seemed to me that pain and suffering went hand in hand. In my idealized way of thinking, happiness meant not having the pain or the suffering. Happy people didn't feel pain, did they? I am starting to understand that it is normal to feel a wide range of feelings, including pain. What is not normal is to stay in the suffering, as I have done so many times throughout my life.

I have been feeling pain recently...I am leaving Israel, the place where I have created and built a life in the past eight months. I am sad to leave the wonderful friends I've made, I'm sad to leave my grandfather, and I am sad to leave this country. Yet, it is time to go. My heart hurts at the thought of leaving, but you know what? It is refreshing to feel this pain and to know that I can feel this pain without letting it take over my life. Just because I am feeling pain does not mean that I must suffer. Suffering comes in many forms. I used to suffer when I'd pick up food instead of feel the feelings. Even after being abstinent for a while, I would suffer by going into my bed when I didn't want to feel, or running away in other ways. Today, I am feeling the pain and still showing up for life, doing what I need to do to take care of myself and my responsibilities. The suffering is truly optional. I don't beat myself up for what I am feeling. I feel it and then I do the next right thing. I am starting to understand that pain and suffering do not necessarily go hand in hand.

With love in recovery,

Alina

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Dear Friend in Recovery, Here is a formula that used to be my life:

Isolation + limited meetings [infrequent access to] = limited recovery

~ MEET RAINBOWGRL ~

There's a new face in the recovery room. Her name is RainbowGrl. Though RainbowGrl has only been attending meetings for the last few weeks, she has already stepped up to the plate and ran her first meeting in the recovery room. Kudos to you, RainbowGrl!

RainbowGrl first heard about OA through a life-long family friend, and came into the program...
"... hoping to build on my self-esteem and find support for my arduous climb through the 12 steps."
"...It would be great if I could find a sponsor that matches well with my experience and issues."
"I am a chronic binger, and the binges got worse when I (former bulimic) stopped purging."

Like many people who come to OA, RainbowGrl is a victim of abuse.

How did you feel about your first meeting?

"A bit nervous, but once it was over I felt a wonderful sense of relief. I was relieved to discover how much I had in common with the TRG OA community. It was great to feel like I had somewhere I could be 100% honest. Not too amazing, since I have experience in other recovery groups, but it is wonderful."

~ FROM THE TWELVE-STEP LITERATURE ~

~~ FROM THE BIG BOOK ~~

"Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers/overeaters, will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous/Overeaters Anon may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out."
c. 2001, Alcoholics Anonymous, page 153

MY SHARE...

When this wonderful book was first printed, many were praying for its teachings to go onward and upward and gradually helping all those who were still suffering.

I was led to this group, OA, about 3 1/2 years ago now. I am a completely different person and can truthfully say that it has changed my whole life. As thousands of thoughtful members have done, I have tried to follow thru with giving service, the 12th Step, to The Big Book Loop and help all newcomers who enter our doors.

It is my pleasure and duty to pass on what I have learned here and help all those who are still in need.

Many blessings on your Path To Recovery and Happiness

Much Love in Recovery,
    Myrlene (Big Book and Recovery Co-coordinator)

A good many years ago I heard the first three steps of AA described as, "I can't, God can, I'll let Him!" In the years that followed, both in and out of Program, I've been repeatedly amazed at how many ways there are for those second and third steps to play out... but one thing never changes - it's always about communication between an Higher Power and the surrendered, recovering individual.

Because of our differing belief systems, HP speaks to us in different ways. However, regardless of the primary way, I've noticed over the years that HP also uses a variety of other means to get under our defenses and get the message across... while we are not looking, so to speak. Sunsets and sunrises speak to our souls of the everlasting light of recovery that is available to us, of one day at a time, of keeping things simple, of seeing the light in each other and each circumstance.

Animals, who give love so freely, remind us that we are loved by HP in a way that is even more exuberant and unconditional. Nature reminds us that we are strong and resilient regardless of what "reality" looks like as it rises repeatedly from seasonal flux and environmental battering. Out of the mouths of our children and friends, and enemies, proceed pearls that can be woven into a garment of wisdom and recovery.

I have looked at the AA/OA community as a very efficient vehicle to disseminate all this wonderful communication, sort of like an HP magnifier!! My road of 16 years of relapse began with a separation from the OA fellowship and my return began with an invitation to join another 12 step group. Could it be that like the coal that dies on the hearth, we need the fire of each other to remain in the heat of our recovery?

Joy and light,
Helen