Dear God,

Good morning, rain and all. It sounds so comforting on the window pane. Reminds me of an Eddie Rabbit Song about rain, which is now blowing in the window.....oops!! That's fixed. Why is it that I have this need in me to rise up for unpopular causes even in program? Have I not been in enough controversies over the last 24 years? You tell me what to do with what I can only see as tradition breaks and others see as "I can say whatever I want".

This wonderful gift You have given us brings with it the responsibility to protect and pass it on as given. Oh sure, we can gussie-up what we say as our life experience and still bring topics to our fellows that can be used improperly, not intentionally, but improper just the same. I would say that the traditions are not merely suggestions to be ignored at our whim, but rules by which we protect the Twelve Steps and our way of life. If I'm out of line here, You will let me know as You have in the past. I wonder if I'll ever be as right as I am wrong. The scale is really tilted. Meanwhile, I can use Your help with me today as I'm going to pick up my OA/AA pal and goof away the day: lunch, a movie and lotsa good conversation. You know I tend to screw up when things are going good. Please watch over and take good care of my family, friends, fellow sufferers, the general population, and the folks I don't like. Allow me to know and do Your will today. Thanks, Big Guy!

And Why Not?
Danny

Dear Friends on the Journey,

My name is Mari, and I have a loathsome disease that has plagued me for a lifetime. It affects every area of my being and has accounted for the very best and the very worst of me. Most of you who are reading this, share this disease with me and I am grateful for a support system with you in it. I'm not at all sure what my life would be like without you. Part of my program is to journal my thoughts and feelings and I appreciate your letting me share them with you.

"Beginners often get startling results at the first time of trying, for all that is absolutely essential is to have an open mind, and sufficient faith to try the experiment. Apart from that you may hold any views on religion ... or none.

As for the actual method of working, like all fundamental things, it is simplicity itself. All that you have to do is this: STOP THINKING ABOUT THE DIFFICULTY, WHATEVER IT IS, AND THINK ABOUT GOD INSTEAD. This is the complete rule, and if only you will do this, the trouble, whatever it is, will presently disappear. It makes no difference what kind of trouble it is. It may be a big thing or a little thing ... but whatever it is, just stop thinking about it, and think of God instead. That is all you have to do."
     . . . . Emmet Fox ... From the Golden Key

~ FROM THE RECOVERY GROUP MEMBERS ~

Dear Recovery Friends,

I do my best writing in the wee hours, the nether time, when part of the world is turning in (like I used to do in my crazy days), part is very soundly asleep and part, like me, is up contemplating whatever. This time used to be 'free' eating time, because it neither counted as yesterday and wasn't REALLY the present day (and I have no idea how I came to that conclusion).

I am, and always will be, a COE, and once I admitted this it didn't matter if it was a holiday, if I had a cold or if it was snowing, even though all three happened within weeks of each other. My life pre-OA was unmanageable, eating made it more so, and I had to also admit I was powerless over people, places and things, in addition to turning my will and life and food over to the care of my HP.

I used to be a sneak eater, hiding food so no one would see me eat yet never, EVER, overeating in front of company or with friends. Food is my drug of choice, always was and always will be, and denying this about myself is the same as thinking anything I ate before midnight on New Year's Eve didn't count once the clock struck midnight.

About a week after Thanksgiving I was thinking about how I'd gotten through that holiday at my favorite cousins' house. Pre-OA, I loved the holidays for the sheer reason that the day AFTER each would give me a 'fresh start' on my diet, food plan, etc. My mind can play tricks and can rationalize any bad decision into an intelligent one.

These cousins are easy going, and while they would never understand why I eat the way I do they never question it. We also visited them July 4; that day I simply committed 'an abstinent meal' to my sponsor. (HP must have planned it so there were specific abstinent foods I could eat.) On Thanksgiving I ate the abstinent meal I'd committed - I knew the foods being served and committed the abstinent ones - and afterwards I thought about the former me, the one who used to 'sneak eat' BEFORE the meal so there was no room in me FOR the meal, but lots of room to stuff dessert AFTER the meal.

I won't deny I felt a twinge of guilt because I didn't taste what was prepared, and I was very aware that I might get caught 'not eating' although there were plenty of hearty types to take up the slack for me. The former me would have eaten over feeling guilty for both not eating the meal AND for overeating before and after the meal.

However, I chose to busy myself in the kitchen with my cousin, which gave me quality time with him as I cleared the dishes and put away the leftovers. This to me was just as good as eating because it made my eyes and nose happy. The former me would have secretly eaten during this time, too, but being around the food didn't faze me one bit.

I took care of myself by typing notes and posts before we left for the day, making a phone call from the hotel room before my cousin picked us up and took us to his house, and saying a little prayer that what I ate didn't matter as much as my being there did. Since HP was taking care of my needs, after we got back to the hotel (the leftovers called my name since we'd eaten early dinner) I went downstairs to use the hotel's computer and typed more notes, one to my sponsor. Yes, it was a long night, and I got hungry, but it was far better to be hungry than to be overfed and bloated.

The following week my parents and I went to my brother and sister-in- law's house for a belated holiday and birthday celebration for my dad. The last time we were there for lunch my sister-in-law had very little protein, and what was there contained what I could not eat. She is not like the cousins I visited recently, who would have made me a whole other meal had I asked for it. My sister-in-law is the person I refer to when I say I mended a broken relationship in the past year, and boy, do I mean it! There was a huge fight, and I thought she'd never speak to me, even after I made amends.

Thus I am now careful not to make a fuss when we eat at her house and to be gracious about whatever she prepares, even though I think our relationship is still in 'infancy'. So when we asked what we could bring I decided to bring the one thing she never serves, salad. Sure enough, she forgot to buy it that day, and mine was enough for everyone so at least there was one food I could eat.

For me it's choosing carefully from what is served and/or bringing what I need - and enough for everyone. This is how I take care of myself for one meal of one day of the holiday season. Whereas I once dreaded this time of year I now love it, more so because I'm abstinent and able to enjoy it fully.

And when the clock strikes midnight, instead of looking forward to a new diet, I'll anticipate a New Year.

Love,
Janie

In 1958, Rozanne took a friend to a Gambler's Anonymous (GA) meeting. As the members shared their stories, Rozanne heard her story - not of gambling , but compulsive overeating. A year later, desperate at 161 pounds, she returned to GA to see if they had an answer to her eating problem. She knew that they had what she wanted, that the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions founded by Alcoholics Anonymous and modeled by GA offered her a chance to change her life, but it was the wrong compulsion.

One day in 1960, while talking to her neighbor, Jo S., she admitted, "I'm a compulsive overeater and I'm having a terrible time." She went on to describe an idea she had for a group called "Overeaters Anonymous". Jo admitted that she, too, had a problem and would like to join her group. At that moment the Fellowship of Overeaters Anonymous was born.

Rozanne and Jo, along with Bernice K., held the first meeting in a living room in Los Angeles, California. Since then, thousands of OA groups have started all over the USA, Canada and other countries around the world.

1. Atmosphere: Offer unconditional support, love and acceptance; talk to newcomers.
2. Structure: Begin and end the meeting on time; adhere to traditional format.
3. Focus: Honestly and consistently share experience, strength and hope.
4. Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions: Practice the Steps and Traditions; show commitment to the program.
5. Sponsors: Have them available and willing to help others.
6. Abstinent members: Show commitment to abstinence and physical recovery; qualify when sharing; show enthusiasm for program.
7. Program spoken here: Focus on program basics and solutions; practice principles before personalities; don't allow cross talk.
8. Literature: Use and display only Conference- approved literature.
9. Service: Show enthusiasm, encouragement and support.
10. Rotation of service: Have reliable, responsible and committed members in service positions; honor abstinence requirements; hold regular group conscience meetings.
11. Service above the group level: Promote participation at intergroup and other service body activities.
12. Fellowship: Come early and stay late; reach out to members between meetings; socialize with members outside the meeting.