A Wellspring of Hope
Newsletter of The Recovery Group
Volume 6, Issue 8
|ser*en*dip*i*ty ~ (noun) First appeared 1754:
the faculty or phenomenon of finding
valuable or agreeable things not sought for.
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~ FROM OUR EDITOR ~
Dear Serendipity Friends,
Welcome to the August issue of The Recovery Group's newsletter. You
will find lots of good stuff here this month: an inspiring message from
our founder, news from the administrators of our different divisions,
as well as an invitation to be a TRG sponsor or a Telephone Angel.
Curious? Read on, enjoy, and soak up all the wonderful words and
thoughts which make up this month's newsletter.
Have a comment? Have a complaint? Write a letter to the editor!
Remember this is your newsletter, too. Share your experience,
strength and hope with others by writing an article for the "From our
I hope you're each enjoying your summer. Personally, it's going by way
too fast for me!
Newsletter of The Recovery Group
~ FOUNDER'S CORNER ~
~ OA VOTES TO REGISTER ONLINE MEETINGS ~
Dear Friends in Recovery,
We're in the middle of the Dog Days of Summer. Sharing on
the loops is down a little, some loopies are gaining weight
from sheer boredom, kids are groaning about having to go
back to school because they're used to freedom and tempers
are sometimes very short.
I'm going to try not to look at August that way. First of all,
it's my birthday month ... and secondly I stay in air-conditioning
as much as I possibly can. I love nature in summer. The flowers
are beautiful. Rain usually brings along a rainbow. And the
craziness of the holidays, though getting closer, is still a long
The Dog Days find us winding down ... and we all have a
wonderful opportunity to really focus on our Twelve Step program.
We can meditate outside under a tree at dusk and feel a
welcome cool breeze. We have more daylight and can take
longer walks and get more exercise. Fresh fruits and
vegetables are plentiful and that can be a boon to our food
plan. We can pick flowers and bring the outside inside and
soothe our spirit with God's beauty. A vacation can rejuvenate
us. And for those lucky enough to have pools, nothing feels
better than splashing around outside in water.
Happy Dog Days, Loopies.
Love in recovery,
~ FROM THE DISCOVERY LOOP DIVISION ~
The loops of Discovery are continuing to thrive and grow as Mary and
Cody, the Division Leaders, continue to recruit and find New Trusted
Servants. Mary W. is working hard as Discovery Kitchen now has 104
members and 2 Coordinators. They are trying to use their experience,
strength, and hope to get their members to share. Exercise & Discovery
now has 49 members and is fully staffed with Trusted Servants doing jobs
such as Greeting a newcomer, saying good-bye to someone who chooses
to leave, a web-servant to get the loop out in the world-wide web and
Coordinators to manage the whole loop and make sure things run smoothly.
On the kids side of things Cody is the Coordinator for both Co-kids and
Kids & Discovery. Kids & Discovery a loop only for kids and trusted
servants has 12 members and has some sharing happening between Cody
and a youth with an eating disorder. Co-kids a loop for parents,
grandparents, or basically anyone who needs help helping a child who
eats compulsively has had a few people subscribe this month and sharing
volume also has increased. A parent even reached out for help and
another parent emailed her back sharing what has worked for her when
dealing with her own child who had an eating disorder and then ultimately
got help. All in all it is great that we have these loops for people
to discover and find when they are in need!
Mary W (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Discovery Loops Coordinators
~ FROM THE TRG OA MEETING DIVISION ~
With the increasing number of people wishing to be leaders, we have now
established a system of pairing new leaders with existing leaders, thereby
having two leaders for the one meeting time slot. This is a great help
when one of the leaders is unable to lead; however, not all time slots have two
leaders and if anyone wishes to have a partner, or become a partner,
please let us know.
We have also established a list of leaders willing to lead, but with no
time slot available. This means that anyone who wishes to be a leader can be
added to the pool of registered leaders so that when/if a time slot does
become available, there is someone to take over immediately.
It is so important that there always be a meeting available for those who
are suffering inside and outside of this program so thank you to all the
meeting leaders who have contributed so willingly to our meetings by
subbing for others, by pairing with other leaders or by joining the list
Thanks also to Cindy who has taken over the management of the Meeting
Schedule and to Danielle who now provides the meeting topics. Cindy and
Danielle have replaced Jeannine who has moved on to other areas of
Leaders are still needed from overseas and areas outside of the USA, so
please don't hesitate to contact the group if you can give service to
these wonderful meetings.
TRG On-Line Meeting Coordinators Terri, Barry and Christine
TRG Online Meeting Leaders' Group: MeetingTS@yahoogroups.com
TRG Online Meeting Administration: MtgAdm@lists.TheRecoveryGroup.org
~ FROM TRG'S SPONSOR PROGRAM ~
This month we asked the TRG sponsors to share some of their thoughts
about why they share their recovery through sponsoring. Here are some
of those thoughts:
"I sponsor so I can recover. The Big Book tells us that this
is the road to recovery by helping another addict."
If you have or are taking the steps with a sponsor, you are now ready
to sponsor up to the level of your own recovery.
"Sponsoring also keeps me better aligned with my HP when I share that
"It saves my life by sharing these steps with others who are still
suffering. I would have never begun sponsoring without my sponsor
encouraging me to take that step. He has helped me so much I want to
share that with others."
"I have so much gratitude for my freedom and want to pass this on to
others...that's why I sponsor."
"I think the quality of my recovery would deteriorate if I wasn't
"I sponsor b/c I cannot keep my recovery unless I give it away. In the
Big Book, it says that "practical experience has shown us that nothing
will so much ensure immunity from compulsive eating as intensive work
w/ other compulsive eaters." I have certainly found this to be true in
my own life."
"For me sponsoring and being sponsored are necessary if I want
to continue on this happy road to recovery."
You are invited to become a Recovery Sponsor:
A Recovery Sponsor guides their sponsee through the Twelve Steps
and helps him/her learn to live a three-fold abstinent life consisting
of emotional,physical and spiritual abstinence.
You are invited to become a Recovery Temporary Sponsor:
There are occasions one needs a temporary sponsor because of
their sponsor being ill, out-of-town or an emergency.
A Recovery Temporary Sponsor will sponsor someone until she/he
finds a permanent sponsor. Temporary Sponsors can help us begin
our three-fold abstinence as we look for a permanent sponsor or fill
in for a sponsor who is unavailable for a short period of time.
Responding to this invitation is a gift to your recovery ~
Just say YES!!!
To become a TRG Sponsor, please write to:
Patt and Cate, TRG Sponsor Coordinators
The Recovery Group Sponsor Group Trusted Servants
~ FROM OUR RECOVERY GROUP MEMBERS ~
~ Put the Glass Down ~
A lecturer was giving a lecture to his student on stress management.
He raised a glass of water and asked the audience, "How heavy do you think
this glass of water is?"
The students' answers ranged from 20g to 500g.
"It does not matter on the absolute weight. It depends on how long you
If I hold it for a minute, it is OK.
If I hold it for an hour, I will have an ache in my right arm.
If I hold it for a day, you will have to call an ambulance.
It is the exact same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it
"If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, we will not be
able to carry on, the burden becoming increasingly heavier.
What you have to do is to put the glass down, rest for a while before
holding it up again.
We have to put down the burden periodically, so that we can be
refreshed and are able to carry on."
So before you return home from work tonight, put the burden of work
down. Don't carry it back home. You can pick it up tomorrow.
Whatever burdens you are having now on your shoulders, let it down for
a moment if you can.
Pick it up again later when you have rested.
Rest and relax.
Life is short. Enjoy it!!
Submitted with love in recovery by: Nody
~ RECOVERY WRITERS' SERIES ~
~ Ten Ways to Love Ourselves ~
In July we invited you to begin to exploring Ten Ways to Love Ourselves,
one of our Recovery Writers Series. As you may recall this particular
series of essays is based on our writer's reaction to Louise Hay's book
"The Power Is Within You." Perhaps, like me, this Writer's Series has
piqued your curiosity about the book and you may have picked up a copy
to read yourself. Or perhaps you have continued reading our featured
writer's remaining essays. Either way, we hope you will join us this
month as we will look at creating a support system for ourselves, and
join us again in September.
(Note: if you wish to read the remaining Reflections, the entire
collection of articles can be found at:
TEN WAYS TO LOVE OURSELVES *
~ STOP ALL CRITICISM ~ ~
CRITICISM NEVER CHANGES A THING.
REFUSE TO CRITICIZE YOURSELF.
ACCEPT YOURSELF EXACTLY AS YOU ARE.
WHEN YOU CRITICIZE YOURSELF,
YOUR CHANGES ARE NEGATIVE.
WHEN YOU APPROVE OF YOURSELF,
YOUR CHANGES ARE POSITIVE.
~ DON'T SCARE YOURSELF ~
DON'T SCARE YOURSELF.
STOP TERRORIZING YOURSELF
WITH YOUR THOUGHTS.
IT'S A DREADFUL WAY TO LIVE!
FIND A MENTAL IMAGE THAT GIVES YOU PLEASURE
( MINE IS A WATERFALL),
AND IMMEDIATELY SWITCH YOUR SCARY THOUGHT
TO A PLEASURABLE THOUGHT.
~ BE GENTLE AND KIND AND PATIENT ~
BE GENTLE WITH YOURSELF.
BE KIND TO YOURSELF.
BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF
AS YOU LEARN THE NEW WAYS OF THINKING.
TREAT YOURSELF AS YOU WOULD
SOMEONE YOU REALLY, REALLY LOVED.
~ BE KIND TO YOUR MIND ~
SELF HATRED IS ONLY HATING
YOUR OWN THOUGHTS.
DON'T HATE YOURSELF
FOR HAVING BAD THOUGHTS.
GENTLY CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS.
~ PRAISE YOURSELF~
CRITICISM BREAKS DOWN THE INNER SPIRIT.
PRAISE BUILDS IT UP.
PRAISE YOURSELF AS MUCH AS YOU CAN.
TELL YOURSELF HOW WELL YOU ARE DOING
WITH EACH AND EVERY LITTLE THING.
~ SUPPORT YOURSELF ~
*Permission for the above given by Louise Hays, Author.
Dear Friends on the Journey ~
FIND WAYS TO SUPPORT YOURSELF.
REACH OUT TO FRIENDS AND
ALLOW THEM TO HELP YOU.
IT IS BEING STRONG
TO ASK FOR HELP
WHEN YOU NEED IT.
Why do we have to love ourselves? Why can't we just go on
with our lives and be the way we are? So what ... if we weren't
programmed when we were little to love ourselves. Is it really
that big of a deal? This is Day Six of "How to Love Ourselves"
and these exercises just aren't as easy when you do them
everyday as we would like them to be.
I've gone all week trying not to criticize myself. Day One. And
I believe I've done a pretty good job of it ... but today I am having
trouble not doing that. It's a fine line between justifying things ...
and not criticizing myself. Why I am doing that ... justifying? And
when is it appropriate that I criticize myself?
I do really good each day on not scaring myself. Day Two. I couldn't
do that before recovery ... before I learned how harmful it was to let
scary thoughts linger in my mind. I've learned how to stop in my tracks
and put bad thoughts out of my mind. Visualization. Couldn't do this
before I learned how to visualize.
I also think I've done pretty good on being gentle, kind and patient
with myself. Day Three. Not doing particularly good with that today,
however. I'm running behind on some things. I'm chastising myself for
that ... I'm not patient ... I'm pushing ... trying to put out fires
and still get things done that I need to do. I'm feeling guilty about
not completing some things. I need to work on this some.
It has been a long time since I've felt any self-hatred toward myself.
Day Four. It took me years and years to conquer that one. It even took
some therapy along the way. And it took working the Steps.
I believe the hardest one is to praise myself. Day Five. I have high
expectations and usually don't praise myself unless I exceed those.
Lately, though, I feel a sense of accomplishment for just getting about
anything done. So, I guess, as time goes on and we begin to simplify
our life one can get just as much a sense of accomplishment from
making up a bed as they can for creating a masterpiece. I tell myself ...
"you did a fabulous job making up that bed this morning. It was
This is Day Six. Being strong. Support ourselves. Reaching Out. Asking
for Help. Sometimes we aren't strong enough. We can't do certain things
alone. Why is it so hard for me to reach out? Why is asking for help so
difficult? I need to reach out today. I need help. I'm going through
another crisis with the copyrights on my writing. I can't handle this
alone. I'm going to be strong. I'm hanging in there at the moment. But
it's tenuous. I'm going to communicate before the day is over. Will it
sound like whining? Be strong? How strong am I supposed to be. Ask for
help? Will I appear weak if I do?
Day Seven tomorrow. No wonder we don't love ourselves. Do people who
love themselves really do all of these things? Does it just come
automatically to them? I believe it does. I wish I could raise my
children over. I didn't teach them all of these things about loving
themselves. Maybe because I taught them what I did teach them; however,
they don't need to learn all of this. Maybe it just comes automatically
Loving myself today
is not as easy as it was
yesterday. Help me to learn
to do all of this automatically.
Help me to really love myself.
A Member of The Recovery Group