It's Friday morning, it's raining here in SW Florida, so didn't go for my walk today,(yet) hopefully it will clear enough to get out. I do have errands to run so will get at least some walking about today.
Someone wrote about "willpower" the other day and one of the responses was about giving someone some "exlax" and then telling them to exercise willpower not to go. Made me laugh but it was a great analogy. Forget the exlax, and just try not "going" using sheer willpower... you can control it for a while, but eventually the biology of our bodies forces us to relieve ourselves. It is inevitable, necessary and totally beyond us to alter it.
Same thing for me and my substances, if I ingest certain foods/substances, my body WILL react no matter how much I try to control the outcome. I have learned that some foods are just out of bounds for me because "I" cannot control the outcome, it is a function of MY biology. I am powerless in this regard. The power I DO have is not to eat those substances that I have learned are detrimental to me. This is where HP comes into play for me, to keep me constantly aware of my powerlessness and asking for strength to remain conscious of that fact, to turn the decisions about this over to a power greater than myself.
Left to my own imaginings I can come up with reasons it would be okay for me to have something, "just this once". But if I remain in contact with my HP, I cannot play these games. My Higher Power speaks to me through many avenues, my intuition, people in program, my children, strangers I meet, etc. The other day I was waiting for a prescription and a stranger came up to me and introduced herself and said she just wanted to congratulate me on my efforts and weight loss. She sees me walking everyday and felt compelled to say something to me. I said thank you, turned to the pharmacist who was watching this and kind of rolled my eyes and smiled, and then SHE said, yes it was very noticeable and she congratulated me also... what a nice serendipity while I was there waiting for pain pills from the oral surgery I had just undergone.
The lesson for me was that I can affect people I don't even know by simply working my program.
I have a list on my refrigerator, I read it everyday.
4 Rule of Life:
1. Life will not be fair.
2. Life will not be easy.
3. Life does not owe you anything.
4. If you forget the first 3 rules of Life, you will be miserable.
I also love this:
~ RULES FOR BEING HUMAN ~
You will receive a body.
You may like it or hate it,
but it's yours to keep
for the entire period.
You will learn lessons.
You are enrolled in a full-time,
informal school called life.
There are no mistakes, only lessons.
Growth is a process of trial, error
The "failed" experiments are as much
a part of the process as the experiments
that ultimately "work".
Lessons are repeated until they are learned.
A lesson will be presented to you in various forms
until you have learned it.
When you have learned it,
you can go on to the next lesson.
Learning lessons does not end.
There is no part of life that doesn't
contain it's lessons.
If you're alive,
there are still lessons to be learned.
"There" is no better than "here".
When your "there" has become "here",
you will simply obtain another "there"
that will again look better than "here".
Other people are merely mirrors of you.
You can not love or hate something
about another person unless it reflects to you
something you love or hate about yourself.
What you make of your life is up to you.
You have all the tools and resources you need.
What you do with them is up to you.
The choice is yours.
It all boils down to acceptance of the way things are. Accepting that certain foods are off limits to me. Accepting that I am powerless over people, places, and things in my life. Accepting that the power I do have is how I "react" to what happens to me, but that I cannot control "what" happens to me.
I am learning to BE where I am today, to BE PRESENT wherever I am. I'm not perfect but getting better, and THAT'S a direct result of working this 12 Step Program.
Well, the clouds are clearing a bit, and my legs need the exercise, so will be off on my walk after all.
love and hugs,
Table of Contents