DAY FORTY FIVE~ MEETING FORTY FIVE
JUST AS I AM
Before I came to program, I couldn't even look myself in the eye. It was impossible for me to accept any facet of my personality or to like any one part of my body. Even the couple of things on me that I thought were okay; I would find some way to criticize. I don't think I ever once looked in the mirror and thought, "hey, I look pretty good." As far as my actions, feelings and thoughts, I seemed to think I was doing okay. I thought I was an okay kind of person. Well, the program has taught me the truth and it is really hard to face my faults and even to just admit them to God much less other people.
I don't like the person that I used to be, but I am really starting to like the person that I am becoming. I still slip back into old behaviors quite often and others quickly remind me of it. Why is it that they cannot just accept me as I am? They don't want to seem to want to help me to grow. They want the quick fix that the program is not.
Until tomorrow ~
I'm Kim
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